Our babies are born helpless and naive, depending entirely on our care. As they grow up, they begin to demonstrate the peculiarities related to their personality. Boys tend to be more restless and somewhat rough in touching and acting. Girls are more sensitive, can be calmed down more easily and are more sociable.
All biological differences between boys and girls can be mitigated or strengthened by the behavior of parents and the whole environment. After all, the child is like a blank canvas that will acquire the colors with which we paint them.
Raising girls is a challenge for men. Learn how to act to make your daughter a wonderful adult.
1. Exercise your authority
Girls have a very special way of asking their parents for what they want. These “melt” and fulfill all your wishes. Doing so will not make your daughter a balanced adult capable of facing the world. Saying “no” when appropriate and “yes” if the request is appropriate is the role of the father and mother. Just explain the reason for your attitude.
2. Accept the child’s “no”
If you can say “no” to your daughter, you must also allow her to do so. For example, if she doesn’t want to wear a certain blouse or doesn’t want to greet a person with whom she has no empathy. She must have that freedom, but if any “no” of her is unfathomable to you, don’t scold her, just explain your reasons for disagreeing. This creates freedom in your relationship and when she is a teenager and has her first boyfriend, she will feel free to ask questions and tell her how she is feeling.
3. Help your daughter when she needs to leave her mother
Both girls and boys need, at some point in their lives, to abandon the close relationship with their mothers and start to develop their own personality. This separation occurs earlier for males than for females and the child needs to know that the mother’s independence will not leave her helpless and is part of her growth. Therefore, the presence of the father is of unequaled importance, since he must surround her with care and attention to facilitate this process. This process occurs normally and it is important that, as a parent, you do not transfer it to you, but learn to be emotionally self-reliant.
4. You are the example
Keep in mind that everything you do and say will affect your daughter’s personality. She, like any child, learns from examples from people she trusts. If there is domestic violence, she will learn that this is normal; if there is animosity between the relatives, she will find that she can disentangle them as well, and so on. Try to make your daughter a better person than you. It is not the school, friends, grandparents or teachers responsible for this, but the father and mother.
5. Always listen
According to scientific data, 50% of 16-month-old girls understand 206 words. While the same percentage of boys understands only 134. At 18 months of age, they have a vocabulary of 56 words and they have only 28 words. Only at 20 months, most boys are equal to girls.
But what do I mean by that? That girls talk and pay attention to many more things than boys, since they are born. So, the father needs to know how to listen. Do not stop your daughter from expressing herself, from opening up to you, even if she is only talking about what your doll did during the day.
Later on, she will also feel safe to talk to you about what her teenage friends and she do when they go out alone. Such a relationship is built over time, but needs to be started as soon as possible in the child’s life.
6. Play with your daughter
It is not because she is female that her daughter does not like to run, jump, play ball, ride a bicycle, play with clay and sand or smear paint when painting a picture. These are activities that the father can propose. Moments of interaction between father and daughter, which involve playful activities, are great for strengthening the bonds between them. But if your daughter wants to play doll with you, why not have fun too? Leave sexism aside, as there is nothing wrong with doing this.
7. Protect your daughter
The best way to protect your daughter is to teach her to trust her own worth. Help your girl to consider herself a courageous, independent, capable and owner of her feelings and her body. This way, she will be able to explore the world without submitting to what hurts her personality and beliefs. If a girl always feels loved and respected by her father, she will be able to walk her way without regret or self-reproach. Anyway, she will be a full adult.
8. Teach your daughter that women are not weak
This teaching must begin early in the child’s life. Encourage your daughter to reach her goals: if she asks for a toy, say she can get it; if you want to put on a shoe, tell them to try it before offering to put it on. But remember: always be aware of age-related limitations and do not force a situation that the child is not ready to face, because instead of encouraging him, you are reaffirming that he is unable to do anything without your help .
9. Put jealousy aside
You are a father, but you must also be friends with your daughter. Don’t scold her when she tells you something you don’t want to hear. If she tells you about her recent interest in boys, it is because she is growing up and needs to understand how to act in the face of this news. A male person can be a source of valuable information when it comes to relationships between boys and girls. Respect your daughter’s feelings. Teach your girl to choose well with whom she relates. Jealousy will not help you at all at this time, unless you are looking to distance yourself from having to face the fact that people grow and your interests change.
10. You are not a superhero
You are a human being like any other, with your peculiar characteristics, defects, addictions, manias and qualities. Never try to give your daughter an image of what you are not. Show her that you get it wrong and right. All young women want to marry a prince charming just like their parents, do not give her expectations that will probably never come true. Teach that everyone, including you and your wife, make mistakes and learn from them. Your daughter will grow more sure of herself and understand that perfection is utopian.
